Switch to a Growth Mindset

This is Part 3 of my article series How I Overcame Insomnia in 10 Steps.

One of the biggest mistakes that people make when suffering with insomnia is to look to external circumstances as the cause of their suffering.

Yes, external circumstances do affect us, and yes they do play a role in developing insomnia.

But is it vital to stop looking for reasons that keep you in the insomnia mindset.

This is such an important point. If you feel like a victim of circumstances, you will be a victim. If you decide to take control of the situation, you will be in control.

Once I had made the decision to take control I suddenly felt much more in control and felt that I could actually do things to improve my situation.

Insomnia Mindset

Examples of thought processes that keep us mired in the insomnia mindset:

• I can’t help it, it’s just how I am
• I’ve always been a night owl chronotype
• it doesn’t matter what I do, I toss and turn all night
• My brain just won’t switch off

Now before you get defensive, hear me out.

I told myself all of these things and more, repeatedly, for years. I focused on information about my chronotype and how my natural personality and genetics meant I would just have to live with it. I kept reminding myself that my father is the same, and his father before him. I was destined to be a night owl and struggle with mornings.

I read articles which said that researchers have evidence that chronotypes are genetic. Even science backed up my destiny of being an insomnia sufferer!

I blamed my busy, active mind for not being able to switch off, I thought I was a worrier, an anxiety sufferer, with a naturally alert and restless brain.

Now don’t get me wrong, these things we tell ourselves may well be true – at some point in our lives. But they don’t have to be true forever!

Neuroplasticity

If you’ve never heard of neuroplasticity, here’s a great article to help you understand the basics:

https://www.verywellmind.com/what-is-brain-plasticity-2794886

The simple fact is, our brains are constantly growing new neurons and rewiring our thoughts and memories all the time.

This is how we learn, and re-learn, new things throughout our lives. It is a myth that we cannot learn as adults. Of course we can! Otherwise my mother would still be texting in all capital letters, and my elderly neighbour would not be able to skype his family in Canada every thursday.

What this means is that every time we tell ourselves we have insomnia, we are re-training our brains to to think that. Every time we remind ourselves that our chronotype is genetic, we are constantly reinforcing that same old story.

Fixed Mindset

The insomnia mindset is a fixed mindset. This means we tell ourselves all the time that we can’t do anything about it. It’s not our fault. It’s our external circumstances, our genetics, our personality.

A fixed mindset means just that – it is fixed. There is nowhere to go with it. It doesn’t move or budge.

Growth Mindset

The opposite of a fixed mindset is a growth mindset. And this is where neuroplasticity comes in.

A growth mindset accepts the fact that our brains are always rewiring and forming new neural networks. A growth mindset allows our brain the time and patience to grow and change. A growth mindset is crucial for changing our habits.

The Power of “Yet”

My daughter learned in school that there was one simple word she could add to her sentences to change her outlook from a fixed mindset to a growth mindset. The word was “yet”.

Instead of saying and believing, “I can’t do algebra”, she and her classmates were encouraged to say and believe, “I can’t do algebra yet“.

This one little word changed the whole meaning of the sentence, from a fixed mindset attitude of not being able to do something and never being able to do something – into a growth mindset attitude of being able to learn how to do it.

And this, my friends, is how we tackle anything in life, from insomnia to stopping smoking to weight training.

If you truly want to take control of insomnia and re-wire your brain, you can tell yourself a new story. It really is that simple.

Your New Mindset

So how do we go about changing our mindset, our attitude, our beliefs?

We just need to reframe how we think of ourselves. Instead of focusing on those old stories we told and beliefs we had about ourselves – our genetics, our personality, our chronotype – we simply change our focus to change, empowerment and control.

Earlier, I gave you some examples of the kinds of statements someone with a fixed insomnia mindset might say.

Now I’m going to give you some phrases which you may find useful in re-orienting to a growth mindset:

• “I’m taking control of my sleeping patterns”
• “I’m recovering from insomnia”
• “I’m just having a bad night” (instead of “I can never sleep, this always happens to me” etc)
• “I’m not a morning person yet!”
• “I’m improving my sleep habits day by day”

You can come up with your own phrases too, just make sure that they reinforce your ability to change your situation.

Correct Yourself

Every time you find yourself saying something that keeps you in a fixed mindset, immediately correct yourself and remind yourself that you are taking control, you are making changes, and that you are improving your sleep day by day.

As you keep doing this, keep reframing your thoughts and phrases, keep reinforcing your own ability to change, you will find that that’s exactly what will happen.

I know, it sounds too simple to be true! But it really, really works. You can do anything you put your mind to. I promise!

Summary

• examine your thoughts and beliefs surrounding insomnia
• identify when you are coming from a fixed mindset
• learn about neuroplasticity
• our brains constantly learn and re-learn new things
• we can change our habits no matter how ingrained
• swap fixed mindset for growth mindset phrases
• correct your unhelpful thoughts and beliefs
• take control, empower yourself to make changes in your life

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